Chinese Spy Balloon Finds No Information at Fox News

DeSantis Rounds Up Disney Characters and Puts Them on Bus to New York

George Santos Quickly Removes Job at Wuhan Lab from Résumé

Tucker Carlson Fears That Leaked Texts of Him Telling Truth Will Kill His Brand

Extraterrestrials Admit Responsibility for UFOs but Claim They Were Only Monitoring Weather

Elon Musk Seething with Envy Over Attention Balloon Is Getting

Trump Says DeSantis Lacks the Classified Documents Necessary to Be President

Giuliani Praises George Santos: “The G.O.P. Must Pass the Torch to a New Generation of Liars”

Kevin McCarthy Celebrates One Week of Being Barely Tolerated by Colleagues

McCarthy Asks Whatever Joker Hid His Gavel to Give It Back

Kari Lake Flips Out at 7-Eleven After Buying Losing Lottery Ticket

Elon Musk Named Most Exhausting Person of 2022

Declaration of Independence Found in Trump Storage Unit

Trump Calls for Termination of Constitution Except Fifth Amendment

Trump Says He Did Not Know Identity of Dinner Guest, Owing to White Hood

Kari Lake Storms Out of Thanksgiving After Losing Battle for Wishbone

Trump to Try for Historic Third Impeachment

Trump Claims Melania Supported Oz Because She Is Attracted to Men Who Are Unfit to Govern

Elon Musk Begs Bots Not to Quit Twitter

Americans Seething with Envy of U.K. After Malignant Narcissist Opts Not to Run Again