By Andy Borowitz | The New Yorker
March 2, 2023
ORLANDO (The Borowitz Report)—In a major escalation of his war with Disney, Florida’s governor, Ron DeSantis, has rounded up several of the company’s characters at Walt Disney World and put them on a bus headed for New York City.
At least a dozen characters, including Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, and Elsa, were swept up in the shocking daytime raid, as children visiting the theme park screamed in horror.
A merciless DeSantis explained the seizure of the characters at a midday press conference, in which he claimed that “all of these characters, especially the mice, are card-carrying members of the wokerati.”
The Governor seemed indifferent to the fate of the Disney characters once they arrive in New York. “Let them wander Times Square with Elmo,” he said.
Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.