Thank Your Lucky Stars
- andreasachs1
- 13 hours ago
- 5 min read
By Bonnie Fishman / San Francisco Bay Area
The weeks leading up to Thanksgiving through the New Year are a time to reflect upon what we are thankful for. The kindnesses extended to you (and the kindnesses you try to extend to others). The gratitude for a life well lived, even if you have everyday struggles.
Hang on to what’s most important: love, wellness, joy, safety, peace. I have been clinging to these vital experiences for two years now. So, in November, I decided to mark that with a very special event.
A little personal background before I tell you about it: After a routine blood test during a physical in early 2021 I had a “wonky” result. In summer of 2021 after a dreadful bone marrow biopsy, I was diagnosed with follicular lymphoma. This is a relatively docile form of cancer that they say you’ll die with, not from. It’s a lifetime commitment to being a cancer patient. Me being a cancer patient. Walking into Stanford’s Cancer Center really shook me. But as they say, you can get used to anything.
If this weren’t enough, in June 2023 I was diagnosed with breast cancer. After two surgeries and four weeks of radiation, I was on my way to recovery. But, alas, shortly after radiation was finished, I began noticing a pressure in my chest. After another go at radiation, (which failed), a couple of PET/MRI scans, and several biopsies later, an aggressive form of lymphoma was discovered. From May to September of 2025, I experienced multiple surgeries, lengthy stays in the hospital as well as monthly visits for exploratory surgeries, the inability to talk for two months, the inability to eat for three months, and on and on. (I wrote about my experience in the Insider in September.)
But now, I want to talk about wellness. I’m so grateful to be alive! In late September, I began on the road to recovery. I was weak, very thin, and had no energy. The doctor suggested physical therapy might be in order to get my strength back. The thought of having more appointments for my health was unappealing. I would rehab myself!
Before I got sick? I cooked and baked most days. (I also swam almost a mile five times a week.) I thought to myself that returning to that would be easy. But no. Standing at the kitchen counter takes strength. I could only last 20 minutes at a time. I would need to rest between stints of preparing food.
Day after day, I would try to work in the kitchen longer and longer. After one month, I could sustain a two-hour period of cooking and baking. Not only did it rehab me physically, it changed me emotionally. I became my old self again. I love to create with my hands–and eat what I make, of course! This brought me back to life. I am so thankful that I finally felt restored.
I couldn’t have gotten to a joyful place without the support of others. I’m particularly thankful to all the people across the country–family, friends, and acquaintances–who showered me with words of encouragement. So, I decided to throw myself a wellness party and thank everyone for their concern. On a beautiful Sunday afternoon, on November 9, I hosted 50 people for a garden party. The only regrettable thing was that it was over in the blink of an eye!
I went all out in the catering department. These California folks hadn’t seen a suburban Detroit bash before. It seems many people here rely on Trader Joe’s and Costco for the food. Me, on the other hand, said not so fast! My sisters helped me with the layout of the food displays and the dining tables. We three thrive on party planning so both Nancy and Marcia were as invested in the event as I was.
We set my dining room table for eight, my porch picnic table for ten and three square tables in the shade for four each. Plus, I also had plenty of couches and chairs for seating. All the tablecloths were a fall theme that blended beautifully with the surroundings.
The appetizers were not particularly fancy but very tasty and approachable (in other words, you knew what you were eating). We displayed the large variety of dishes on my kitchen island. My sisters each heated up some items in their respective ovens so there was plenty of room for all of the food to get cooked. I laid out the six different selections of petite pastries on my buffet. We served sparkling water and wine on my porch hutch cabinet.
Success! Guests were thrilled with the presentation, variety, and of course taste of the food. People commented that it looked like it had been catered. Oh, it was! I was a caterer for decades before I retired in 2009. Those skills never go away.
A couple of noteworthy examples of extreme kindness were extended to me during this experience. Carol, a new friend who lives about three hours away, offered to stay overnight so she could help with the preparation, set up, and tend bar. She is an amazing hostess in her own right, so I gladly accepted her offer.
Two days before the party, Brandon, a manager at Trader Joe’s also helped me with my selections. He said, “It looks like you’re celebrating.” I said, “I am. I’m celebrating my wellness and thanking my friends and family for supporting me for over two years of dealing with cancer." A little while later, when I was in the produce department, I heard someone calling my name. It was Brandon with a big, beautiful bouquet of flowers for my party. I was so moved by his thoughtfulness that he made me cry. We stood next to the eggplants crying and hugging. It’s amazing how a small kindness from a stranger can make you thankful. I just love random human connections like that.
(from left to right): Diners spread out to porch couches, the picnic table, and small tables in the shade
Last spring, it was my turn to share in a support group that I attend. Most of the people have trials and tribulations with wellness where every day can seem bleak. I told them that at my lowest point, when I felt that I would never get better or live a normal life, I managed to find joy and gratitude even in a fleeting moment.
Find your joy even in darkness. Be thankful to be alive.
Bonnie Fishman attended the Cordon Bleu Cookery School in London. Later, she owned and operated Bonnie’s Patisserie in Southfield, Mich. and Bonnie’s Kitchen and Catering in Bloomfield Hills, Mich. She has taught cooking for over 35 years and created hundreds of recipes. She is now living in Northern California.