By Andy Borowitz | The New Yorker
May 15, 2023
PENSACOLA, FLA. (The Borowitz Report)—A third-grade teacher in Pensacola, Florida, has been arrested for showing her students a Disney movie featuring a boy character with a girl’s name, school-district officials have confirmed.
The teacher, Carol Foyler, claimed that she thought it was “O.K.” to show the incendiary film because the character in question was a deer.
Governor Ron DeSantis, however, begged to differ, arguing that Florida’s children were being “indoctrinated to emulate the deer’s sick life style.”
“Students in Florida’s schools have not been taught to distinguish between themselves and deer,” he said.
DeSantis also objected to a controversial scene early in the film in which the main character’s mother is shot and killed. “I will not rest until Florida’s schools are rid of such blatant anti-Second Amendment propaganda,” he vowed.