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Biden Torments Trump by Seeing His Ex

June 16, 2021

Photograph by Sergei Bobylev / Getty
Photograph by Sergei Bobylev / Getty

GENEVA (The Borowitz Report)—President Biden has been tormenting Donald J. Trump by being photographed with his ex, associates of the former President report.

According to those sources, Trump accidentally saw a photo online of his ex and Biden enjoying a trip to Switzerland and has been inconsolable since.

“He’s taking it very hard,” one Trump associate said. “All morning, he was just sitting in his darkened bedroom, listening to Adele songs on Spotify. When Adele got to the part in ‘Someone Like You’ where she sings, ‘For me, it isn’t over,’ he had to turn it off.”

The associate said he understood that Trump’s ex was free to see Biden if he wanted, but that posing for photographers “seemed like twisting the knife.”

“I get it—they’re enjoying each other’s company,” the source said. “It’s like Ben and J. Lo. But show a little class.”

Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.



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