Americans Say Send Stephen Miller to Iran

By Andy Borowitz 

March 5, 2026

Win McNamee/Getty Images

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—While Americans strongly disapprove of Donald Trump’s decision to attack Iran, a new poll released on Thursday shows overwhelming support for sending Stephen Miller there.

Over seventy percent of those surveyed “strongly approve” of sending Miller, who bested such other popular choices as Kristi Noem, JD Vance, Karoline Leavitt, Pete Hegseth, and Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.

If Trump moves forward with such a deployment, however, he could run afoul of international law, since the use of Stephen Miller against a civilian population violates the Geneva Conventions and would likely be considered a war crime.