February 27, 2023
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Representative George Santos hastily removed an entry from his résumé indicating that he had worked at a biological laboratory in Wuhan, China, the congressman’s office has confirmed.
The entry, which said that Santos worked at the lab in late 2019, disappeared with no explanation in the early hours of Monday morning.
Speaking to reporters on Capitol Hill, Santos said that he had “no idea” how the Wuhan job wound up on his C.V.
“I haven’t even spent time in China since 2007, when I invented the iPhone,” he said.